#bailey hc

[threads-strings]

My tumblr is trolling me, I had such a nice inbox question/tell but for some reason it wouldn’t let me answer ??

Anyways Anon if you‘re reading this I can‘t spoil too much but unfortunately since actual pregnancy is a bit of a squick to me Reader won’t ever fully get pregnant, but there might be some scares or talks of it :) There‘s a reason for Bailey‘s healing too ofc!

Regardless if I didn’t have to write/hint at Reader being pregnant the idea of Bailey being an actual good father to infants/toddlers and smaller kids is cemented in my brain, I think he likes taking care of actual kids that need him, in a sense that they are fully dependent on him and he has the feeling he can protect them completely (because their own autonomy don’t fuck with his decision making).

He fully realizes at some point his kids/orphans will have to be independent if they want to survive, he can‘t tie their shoes forever after all but I think he never fully forgives them for outgrowing them.

But realistically if Bailey would have a child, chances are he would treat it like any other orphan so they wouldn’t get targeted for being his child, he can’t care too much about these kids because he knows they‘ll end up raped, abused or sacrificed and as much as he tries to act like he doesn’t care, I think their fates do affect him in ways he tries to repress.

[clown-demon]

⏰ - When do they usually go to bed and when do they usually wake up? Bailey

((I know I said Nikolai only.. but I'd give any chance to talk about Bailey. And I already answered this meme for Nikolai soo-.

Bailey is a morning bird. She's usually up at 4am or 5am, usually sets up with a cup of coffee and reads the news on her phone.

She tends to go to bed around 9pm, but if she's watching the kids she'll wait for them to be asleep before going to bed herself. So if that's the case, she's usually in bed by 10pm.

[sweetestflow3rs]

i know what you did last summer!

[nullusreimorio]

Degrees of Lewdity AU: Actor AU

Yes, you heard that right, folks! DoL:ActAU will now be a thing in my blog.

Re-reading this made my brain go BRRRR, because in my head a random person getting their costume's head off is that funny, and from there it all spiraled down.

The Whitney breaks Syd's glasses scene in particular is stuck in my head, because I imagine that at some point, right before Whit can grab the glasses, Syd would scream to wait, making Whit shit himself cuz dude what is happening. The director screams cut, of course. "I'm so sorry, these are my real glasses-" while laughing, and taking them off to give into custody before putting on the props, with Whitney just wheezing in the background.

The genderbent version of LIs would mostly be people that really resemble each other, except for the Kylar duo. They are twins who love to scare other people by just staring at them (it is a running inside joke on set).

Bailey is actually a sweet parental figure off-character, always making sure he didn't actually hurt the other actors (think Jason Isaac in Harry Potter as he switches between the cruel Lucius Malfoy and actually caring for Tom Felton, asking him if he's ok and apologizing when he did in fact hurt him by accident)

Another running gag on set is Harper just.. being there. Smiling at everyone with cold eyes, bombing pictures and selfies. Sometimes they stay in the background of the scene, looking directly at the camera. They say it's funnier to stay in character. Off-character they are very fun to be around, but they enjoy unsettling people. Them and the Kylars are sometimes banned from being in the studio if the scene doesn't need them.

GH got tangled up in the fly system. Everyone laughed and took pictures and videos, but promptly eliminated them at GH's request. They are shy.

The Averys enjoy their role very much. What they don't enjoy is having to drink grape juice or scented water instead of actual alcohol. They do get a nice glass of wine once off-set are over.

Whenever the Wrens are in the studio, F!Whit, M!Robin, the Wrens, F!BW, the Edens, F!Avery and the Baileys get a bit too much into playing cards. Blackjack, Durak, Scopa, Rummy, Machiavelli... the list could go on. They always manage to rope technicians to play with them as well.

Everyone hates the Kylars because their makeup doesn't need much time, while everyone else (ESPECIALLY GH, BW and IW) need enough time to always look polished/roughed up, depending on the situation.

M!Jordan is actually atheist, and whenever he has to talk like a true Christian guy, once his line is over he mocks himself. He enjoys wearing his costume off-set just for shits and giggles, and other actors often visit him in the confessional just to say "I'm sorry daddy, I've been naughty~" "Jail for a hundred years. NEXT"

F!Jordan and Ivory Wraith are actually cousins, and sometimes M!Jordan and Ivory Wraith swap costumes to see if there is any difference other than Jordan's massive tits.

Aaaand that's it, for now! As of now this is how far my brain thought while in the middle of exams, I will slowly add more into it. I don't know if it was already done, but thinking about these jackasses actually play-pretending makes me feel better ^^

[chi-xion]

g’raha tia based off that one image of jonathan bailey

[jinxpantsu]

Please give me more Neriah x Bailey scenarios pls pls pls I'll do anything

(I'm sorry I love them)

Here's a few!

When they were younger, Neriah used to make Bailey's lunches for work. She packed something delicious, a few healthy snacks, and an energy drink and juice for him. There was always a tiny check list with notes inside to ask for his feed back on her cooking and he was diligent in jotting down his opinions for her improvement.

Neriah was a homebody girl. She liked being in the house and enjoys small activities. Bailey thinks coming home to Neriah goofing off is a great way to end his day.

The best drink Bailey has ever had was Karkade! Neriah calls it Sorrel though and they used to bicker about that a lot.

Although Bailey himself is not an exhibitionist, Neriah is a loyal and obedient little lady. He asked her not to wear underwear to a date and was surprised to find she followed his request. He did a 'thorough' check in a private corner when no one else was looking.

They're very involved in each others lives at the start. Ones activity was also the others. If Neriah wanted to start a puzzle, Bailey would join in and buy more as well even if he thought it was lame.

In the same way, Neriah was not very good at playing video games, but would try levels for Bailey' amusement. He allowed her to ruin his accounts with her poor gameplay purely because he thought her struggling was adorable.

Their homelife today is very different from how it used to be. Where Bailey scolds and shoves Neriah around now, it used to be Neriah who would scold Bailey for making messes and not cleaning them. One constant though was he never took her too seriously.

When they're older Bailey rarely calls her Neri/Nery. It's almost always Neriah... even though he knows her name is Nerisiries. He will only call her Nerisiries when he genuinely needs her to shut up and listen. Typically, this is for her own safety. Otherwise he lets her mouth off as he ignores her.

[starcanwrecked-confessions]

As we don’t want to associate ANY characters with him or give him any credit for the characters, my friend and I have decided that the cop that Robert plays during show me your hands in TGWDLM is officer Bailey, and that he was the one grooving.

- 🐇

~~~

[o-uncle-newt]

I guess the only person who can really be trusted to describe the greatness of Agatha Christie is Dorothy L Sayers...?

A while back, the always-sharp @thesarahshay sent me an ask that caught me up on something that I'd carelessly written in some tags- I said that Agatha Christie was good at writing romance into her detective fiction, without really elaborating. I then spent multiple paragraphs attempting to elaborate, I'm not sure with how much success. Essentially, and you can click above to see for yourself, my thesis was that while Sayers was a much better literary stylist (and certainly better at writing romance) than Christie, when writing a detective novel, her seams show; Christie had a natural talent for knowing exactly what belongs in a detective story and creating and fitting all the right pieces together that create a seamless detective story, including motivations drawn by romance (though I think the actual romances are among the weaker elements- still MUCH better than those written by most of her peers, for the record).

I'd had trouble putting into words what I wanted to say (there was a convoluted metaphor about Barbies and Lego in there), and I'm not sure I was too convincing; but turns out that the person who said what I wanted to say the best was, in fact the great DLS herself.

There's a fabulous book that I 100% recommend called Taking Detective Stories Seriously, which is a compilation of about two years' worth of detective story reviews that Sayers wrote. I hadn't heard of most of the authors, and even when I had heard of the authors I'd rarely read the books, but it didn't matter, frankly. She's just such a great writer, so thoughtful and incisive and passionate about both the genre and good craftsmanship (not to mention good English), that everything she has to say including on novels that haven't been in print since the 30s is worth reading. She has generally great taste, though she has a much higher opinion of Margery Allingham than I do and doesn't like Ellery Queen's The Siamese Twin Mystery as much as I'd thought she might (though the fact that a character in it insulted Unnatural Death may not have helped lol); but she also likes, to pick two very different writers who I too enjoy, HC Bailey and Mignon G Eberhart, and so she clearly has a good eye. (It's also entertaining to see her slowly force herself to admit that she likes Perry Mason...)

BUT ANYWAY.

She has three reviews of Agatha Christie books in the volume: Murder on the Orient Express, Why Didn't They Ask Evans, and Three Act Tragedy. She reviews all of them very positively, but it's her review of Three Act Tragedy (in my opinion, funnily enough, the weakest of the three) that she really gets to the core of Christie's genius. And it's actually fitting that it's for a book of hers that's on the more meh end of the scale- because it just shows how even meh Christie has an element of genius that other authors have to work hard for even in their best works.

She says:

Some time ago this column contained the statement that Hercule Poirot was "one of the few real detectives." It was a well-sounding phrase, and I have no quarrel with it, except that I am not quite clear what it meant. What I meant to write and what I thought I had written and what I now propose to write clearly with no mistake about it was and is this: Hercule Poirot is one of the few detectives with real charm. Plenty of authors assure us that their detectives are charming, but that is quite another thing. I don't know that Mrs Christie has ever said a word about the matter. She merely puts Poirot there, with all his little oddities and weaknesses, and there he is- a really charming person. And it is true, too, that he is "real," in the sense that we never stop to enquire whether his words and actions are suited to his character; they are his character, and we accept them as we accept the words and actions of any living person because they are a part of himself. Le style c'est l'homme. Indeed, when Mrs Christie is writing at the top of her form, as she is in Three Act Tragedy, all her characters have this reality. She does not postulate a character- retired actor, West End mannequin, family retainer- and put into its mouth sentiments appropriate to its station in life. She shows us character and behavior all of a piece. However surprising or enigmatic the behavior, we believe that everything took place just as she says it did, because we believe in the reality of the people. Poirot is charming, not because anybody says so, but because is is, and all her other people exist for us in the same objective manner. This is the great gift that distinguishes the novelist from the manufacturer of plots. Mrs Christie has given us an excellent plot, a clever mystery, and an exciting story, but her chief strength lies in this power to compel belief in these characters. [emphasis mine]

Sayers then proceeds to compare another author (or rather authors, the husband and wife pair GDH and M Cole) to Christie in this regard, moving on to another review. But in these three paragraphs she has, I think, said it better than anyone- that Christie's skill is in her naturalness, and how that naturalness compels us to believe in and immerse ourselves in her world. She is effortless and seamless.

To be clear, Sayers praises a lot of people in this book, and a lot of people's writing; but mostly she is praising their skill and ability to create what they have created. Here, she isn't quite praising that- she's praising the fact that the final product is so good that you can't even see the craftsmanship behind it, and that's, I think, what separates Christie from her peers. It's a power, and not one that can be broken down by a critic. She just has it.

I've said before that I don't think Sayers had this as a mystery writer, and I think she'd probably be the first to agree with that assessment; she certainly had a seemingly effortless skill as a prose writer (as these reviews show), but as a novelist she took construction seriously and wanted us to know this. That said, another person who I don't think has this, who I mention because he's someone who a lot of people compare Christie to (often negatively), is John Dickson Carr.

I've seen plenty of people say that Carr is a more sophisticated version of Christie, not just in mystery construction but in writing style, and equally prolific, creative, and versatile. I don't agree with this on most counts, but I think, honestly, that Carr is fine- but you can see the seams easily. He might have been prolific but his formulae are visible and his writing required intentionality on his part. By which I mean- Carr when he's trying to be funny is generally hilarious. Carr when he's trying to be scary is generally spine-tingling. But Carr when he's just trying to get to the next good bit is dull and mechanical. He needs to be paying attention and making an effort in order to be good, and we notice him doing this. Christie never has this problem; even when the actual stuff she's writing isn't high quality, she's never dull. Everything feels purposeful and organic, somehow.

Obviously, all of this is fundamentally subjective, and if there's one redeeming element it's that an incredibly smart lady agrees with me (by my interpretation, at least) and says it extremely well. But I'll be holding on to this one, if nothing else.

[themartiansdaughter]

Any West Wing fans have any headcannons about what class each of them would main in D&D?

[nerdy-prudes-must-age-regress]

hiii this is a super silly request but ermm cg!officer bailey headcanons???? it came to me in a dream /srs

YESS ON IT BOSS 🫡

He takes the BEST care of his littles.

Sometimes brings His littles to the safer jobs, but keeps them in the car at times just in case.

He gives his littles his officer hat to wear !!

He will rock them to sleep. Like.

He will always give his littles forehead kisses <3 always <33

He def plays hide & seek with them !!

[threads-strings]

Bailey the Caretaker

While he isn’t an extremely uptight person, he pays attention not to smoke or be in a state of undress around the orphans. It’s less to be a good example and more because he prefers for them not to humanize him, he’s more comfortable with the idea that all orphans hate him instead of acknowledging that he might be more to them than just an asshole/villain.

(Some thoughts on his design choices below)

I headcanon Bailey to have a strong fat body type since the game mentions how he can pick up a person and just haul them off someone without breaking stride, and he doesn’t seem the type to be dieting/pay attention to achieving glamour muscles.

His tattoos are still from his youth and need a touch up, but he doesn’t bother to do that since he considers it a waste of time by now. The full tattoo is of a large two-headed snake scaling along his torso, one head emerging on his arm and the other on his back. Back in his youth he considered it a symbol of his own duality when he felt more guilt about how he has to act to keep up the appearance of being untouchable, but by now, he considers the symbolism as cringe. He doesn’t necessarily regret the tattoo, and more so the fact he used to make excuses about what he does being “justifiable” in any way.

Most of the scars he has are from his time working in the mines and from what the previous owners of the orphanage put him through, as well as fights he had in his teens. They’re mostly faded but still sensitive to the touch, and he doesn’t like people touching his scars (or him in general).

He doesn’t wear much jewelry since he considers it impractical, the most he’ll wear is a watch, small earrings and sturdy rings.

[clown-demon]

What was Bailey's childhood like?

Bailey's childhood was NOT your normal childhood. When she was born, her parents didn't want her. So instead of sending to her an orphanage, they instead got some money from sending her to a lab.

The scientists did a variety of experiments on her, which is how she gained her looks and became a mutant. What they were originally testing, was to see if they could force and give humans an ability. And while she DID gain an ability, her looks got mutated and she was deemed a failure due to that.

She had no childhood really, she didn't have friends. She was kept in a cell her childhood and fed scraps and leftovers. Her life was basically in a prison cell when growing up and going through experiments and going through excruciating pain.

Due to that, she built up a VERY high pain tolerance. Which is perfect since her ability transfers pain to her so the person does not have to feel pain and their wounds will heal.

[sweetestflow3rs]

DOL LI ( including Wren & Harper ) Voice Actor HCs ♡

[blueiight]

its so telling how louis says “for claudia all humans died with charlie” speaking to the veracity of her grief for him and what charlie represented to her: her last mortal link to the life that she had b4 leslou in that charlie recalls the area around to the rooming home claudia was in and claudia talks about what she remembered - the dollhouse across the street from where she was living - and her first love. the officer the first man she killed called her a devil and the first boy, the last , the only boy she would ever love on this earth called her an angel. the way claudia pursues charlie so - veins like rivers, she says - waiting over the balcony for him to come to her, eating what tastes like garbage for her on a date…

[punkeropercyjackson]

I'm gonna be so fr i think even as an afrolatino Percy Jackson truther that even Halle getting casted as Ariel couldn't make him be obsessed with The Little Mermaid.He dosen't hate it because that's weird and pick meish but he would just.Not care about it at all,he'd be like 'Nice,i hope she gets all the money and fame she wants!Anyway,time to go back to watching Phineas and Ferb then be depressed about Brandy's Cinderella never getting sequels and watching The Proud Family to feel better'

[chenfordswopez]

Hear me out on Jackson, Nolan, and Alicia bonding over how fucking weird their partners can be.